One day, about eight months ago, I found myself hungry with no snacks to eat. So, being a classic Missionary Kid, I went in search of food. But, to my dismay, the mango and banana trees were devoid of any fruit. So, hoping to find something worth eating, I went and found my friend, Mugabe Robert. He knew a lot of the trees in the area, so I asked him if there was any ripe fruit nearby. He took me to a local jackfruit tree (see the above picture) and told me there was a ripe one at the top. But, there was a catch. He said that he was afraid of the wasps in the tree and refused to climb until they were removed. I, thinking I was fearless, volunteered to go and pick the fruit.
Now, as you’ve seen in the picture above, jackfruits are giant fruits that can withstand a twenty-foot fall. The only way to pick them is to saw off their stem and let them drop to the ground. So, armed with a machete, I climbed the tree. Then, seeing the wasp nest, I faltered.
The nest was HUGE. Easily larger than my closed fist, it teamed with wasps.
“Ah, Mugabe?” I shouted down. “If I suddenly jump down, prepare to run.”
Locating the jackfruit proved easy enough. Getting it down, however, looked impossible. It was located not five feet from the giant nest, so if I wanted the fruit, I would need to get within stinging range of the wasps.
Alright, I’ll just be quick and quiet. I thought to myself. Big mistake. Future Elisha was screaming “NO YOU IDIOT!”
Sadly, past Elisha couldn’t hear future Elisha. Past Elisha swung his machete, cutting through a quarter of the stem in a single hit. The movement was all the excuse the wasps needed, and within the span of two seconds, I had multiple stings on my back, neck, shoulders, and arms.
To my credit, I remained calm. I (thankfully) didn’t scream like a girl. Instead, I executed what was probably the fastest descent from a tree in history. I climbed halfway down, then hurled myself the rest of the way, while still being stung even in mid-air.
I landed, tucked, rolled, and ran. I received one more sting, just to show me who was boss before I escaped. Mugabe was long gone, so I was now alone, facing a yard full of angry wasps, and still hungry. Oh, and I had fourteen stings spread across my upper body.
It wasn’t until much later that Mugabe and I worked up the courage to climb the tree and spray the wasps. Obviously, that should have been our first plan, but when you’re hungry, you aren’t thinking of the consequences to your actions. Namely, consequences of stings. But, let me tell you: that jackfruit was amazing. You know the saying “stolen fruit is the sweetest”? Well, in this case, it would be “fruit paid for with pain tastes sweetest”.
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