Honestly, one of the most common questions Africa Boy gets is this: “What are some of the funniest things you’ve seen in Uganda?” Well, after living here for 15.5 years, I have a few that are almost sure to make you laugh.
- Un-logical Jams. One of the strangest things we find in Uganda is the jam. When we read the label, we find that it says “Made in Uzbekistan”, “Grown in Albania”, “To be sold in Egypt”, “Not for sale in the United States”, but being bought in Uganda. Like, is the label a fake, or did the jam travel through three continents, avoiding another, and fly well over three thousand miles to reach the little shop in Kiwoko, Uganda?
- Los Angeles Rams: Super Bowl LIII Winners. Yes, you read that correctly, and if you aren’t a sports fan, then just know that the Rams did not beat the Patriots in Super Bowl LIII. The Patriots won 10-3. But, in preparation for the coming game, shirt makers print off both sides of the game so that the instant the game is over, they’ll have hats and shirts ready. So, when the Patriots won, the shirts that were wrong were shipped off to Africa, and we find them all the time.
- Getting treated for Bilharzia when you really just have the flu. Bilharzia is an easily-treated disease that develops after a person swims in Lake Victoria. Well, easy is a relative term. The pills are so bitter and vile, my younger siblings used to vomit them up, and the stench is so terrible and strong that I usually leave the house for a few hours when someone in my family is being treated. But, when someone goes to be tested for Bilharzia, most of the time the doctors diagnose you as positive if you display even the slightest symptoms of anything. A few times, my dad has been diagnosed, even though he was never in the lake!
- Language confusion. Once, when I was attempting to learn more Luganda (Uganda’s most common language), I asked the word for “I don’t know.” I was given the word “Simanye”, pronounced sih-mah-nee. However, because it started with the letter s, I mistook it for “Sindica”, pronounced seen-dee-cah. That means to push, the physical action of shoving someone. So, for the next few weeks, whenever someone asked me a question I didn’t know, I would respond with “Sindica”, basically saying “Push off”. It wasn’t for a few weeks that someone told me I was saying it wrong, so I had to adjust my wording!
Honestly, that’s all I can remember for now, but I’ll be sure to do a follow-up post when I remember more. Tell me in the comment section below which one was your favorite!
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